We all know them. We all know that resentful feeling we can get while watching them happily scarf down a burger and fries while we nibble on a salad.
It can be frustrating and disheartening, leaving us questioning why weight management seems to come so effortlessly to some while we struggle and make sacrifices on a daily basis.
Why do we have to work so damn hard and they have it sooooooo easy! It’s not FAIR!!!
But is it fair to ourselves to harbor these resentful feelings towards this group of seemingly “lucky” individuals?
In this eye-opening episode of Thin Thinking Podcast, we delve into the subject of envy and resentment towards skinny people, exploring the impact it has on our own weight struggles.
We challenge the notion that envy and resentment are beneficial for our well-being, and instead, we open ourselves up to a different perspective.
By examining the ways in which our negative emotions can hinder our own progress, we take steps towards fostering a healthier mindset and finding peace within ourselves.
What are you waiting for? Come on in and join us as we embark on this thought-provoking journey of self-reflection as we explore our Skinny People Envy.
Together, let’s explore new perspectives and approaches to our weight journey, ultimately fostering self-acceptance, self-care, and personal growth.
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Rita Black: It's not fair. Skinny people have it so easy and we have it so hard. Skinny people. Do you have some in your life? Maybe your friend who chows down twice as much as you and never gains an ounce. It's hard not to resent this group of sub humans who have seemed to won the weight lottery while we struggle and starve and are so deprived. But is all this envy and resentment good for us? Join me in today's Thin Thinking episode where we explore how our envy of skinny people may be keeping us struggling. So come on in.
Rita Black: Did you know that our struggle with weight doesn't start with the food on your plate or get fixed in the gym? 80% of our weight struggle is mental. That's right. The key to unlocking long-term weight release and management begins in your mind. Hi there, I'm Rita Black. I'm a clinical hypnotherapist weight loss expert, best-selling author and the creator of the Shift Weight Mastery Process. And not only have I helped thousands of people over the past 20 years achieved long-term weight mastery, I am also a former weight struggler, carb addict and binge eater. And after two decades of failed diets and fad weight loss programs, I lost 40 pounds with the help of hypnosis. Not only did I release all that weight, I have kept it off for 25 years. Enter the Thin Thinking Podcast where you too will learn how to remove the mental roadblocks that keep you struggling. I'll give you the thin thinking tools, skills and insights to help you develop the mindset you need, not only to achieve your ideal weight, but to stay there long-term and live your best life.
Rita Black: Hello! I'm taking deep breaths and counting the days in a few weeks. My son is gonna turn 18 and will be graduating from high school. So I am just trying to stay present. You know? Those times when you're just trying to hold on. Just hold on to the moment and extend it. Well, this is one of those times in my life I never thought I would see this day where he's graduating and he is going to be turning 18. Oh my gosh. I just thought I'd share that all with you. So much is changing in my life and so that is why my garden is such a joy. It's always going to be there. It doesn't always do what I want, but every season in and out, it's predictable. It's a comfort. It's not predictable in what happens in my garden, but I just know it can be there and I love what's going on.
Rita Black: There's some exciting things going on. I've been playing with different levels of nitrogen and potassium and potass and all those wonderful things that make the soil rich and make the plants love growing and blooming and growing vegetables, tomatoes. So just getting the right balance is so important. Speaking of balance, I'm excited about this week's episode because I think a lot of time our envious skinny people can get out of balance and actually hurt us instead of helping us. A number of students have mentioned how they hate their friends or not hate them, but really resent friends or family members who don't ever have to think about food. And I said to myself, ah-huh, let's pull out one of my favorite episodes from the archive and share it this week. And so here it is and I hope it softens your heart and gives you back some of the power and prestige that you may have given away to skinny people that skinny people envy.
Rita Black: And this episode is sponsored by my on-demand masterclass called How to Stop the Start Over Weight Struggle Cycle and Begin Releasing Weight for Good. The link is in the show notes. So go sign up now. Let's find out how to shift out of our skinny people envy.
Rita Black: Resentment is an interesting emotion and it can be fattening, you know, wether, and it can kind of trip us up a little bit as we talk about. And I'm gonna go there today. I'm going to talk about skinny people envy and resentment and you know, even bringing up the word skinny people, even me, I'm like, you know, I've been managing my weight for 25 years and it brings up a little feeling in me. And I tested this out because I wasn't sure if I should do this episode. You know? Cuz I was like, gosh, maybe like, I think people have skinny people envy cuz I hear from my clients or, you know, I'll do a Shift Weight Mastery process live, you know, when I used to do it live.
Rita Black: We do it primarily online now, but when I would do my live events, you know, I would say skinny people and everybody like, ah, you know, like, you know, the put up the, you know, two finger, you know, get away from me with skinny people already. You know? There's a visceral audible groan in the room when we brought up the words skinny people. So I, you know, really our resentment of skinny people is understood and founded. I mean, you know, gosh, they're so skinny and they get to eat all they want.
Rita Black: But I wanna dive into this today because I really do believe that our resentment only hurts us more and keeps us in a place of weight struggles. So I'm gonna kind of unpack this a little bit. First of all, it is just like, you know, why do we hate skinny people so much? Well, they can eat whatever they want and never gain weight, right? The bastards, how dare they? So, and this, you know, is a pretty commonly held belief by all of us who are not so naturally blessed, not so naturally skinny. And look at how this belief about skinny people can, you know, like I said, keep us in our weight struggle. So let's talk about our struggle identity. You know, I've talked about this on the podcast before, but I'm gonna bring it back. First of all, for those of you who haven't heard me talk about our identity, but, you know, it's always important to remember that, you know, in our subconscious mind, one of the highest level things in our subconscious mind is our identity.
Rita Black: And we all have lots of identities. You know? I'm a southern Californian, I'm a mom, I'm a hypnotherapist. I'm a former weight struggler, I'm a weight master. I am a gardener. You know, I'm you know, I I'm a dog owner, you know, I'm a lot of things and all of those things kind of swirl together in my subconscious mind and create my idea of me. Now, when we struggle with our weight, we live in this world of weight struggle. And weight struggler is one of our identities. You know, you might not consciously be saying I'm a weight struggler, but we see ourselves in a particular way, and it's usually not as a skinny person living their life out in the world. We see ourselves as struggling, you know? And usually we are holding on to hard held beliefs, right? And over time, our struggle or identity grows and we collect evidence for this identity and this kind of weight struggle world we live in.
Rita Black: Like, I don't have a good metabolism and I have a huge appetite, or I can't eat the food I love because it makes me fat, or it's hard for me to lose weight. Or, you know, I hear people say all the time, like, I eat one thing and I gain 10 pounds, or I look at food and I gain weight, and then there comes skinny people, right? So here we are in our weight struggler world, and then we interact with skinny people, skinny people, skinny people, skinny people, skinny people. It just kind of rolls off the tongue, right? Skinny people. I could say another word. I think there's a brand skinny bee you know, and a few other things, but I'm not gonna say that because I'm not here to protect skinny people, but I'm not here to bring them down either. I'm here to make peace with skinny people and why not for skinny people's sake, but for yours. So skinny people are seemingly our polar opposite. They are the ying to our yang. They're the thin to our fat, and it seems just so gosh darn easy for them. It just seems so freaking effortless. And we just start to compare ourselves to them and despair. But here's the thing. The more we envy or hate them for having it easy, the more it defines us as a struggler.
Rita Black: So there was this girl, Sarah, in my high school, and you know, I was an overweight teenager in high school, right? I spent most of my high school years wearing you know, the stretchy elastic waist jeans. And you know, not looking like high fashion, let's just say. You know, I was probably, well, I know I was 25 pounds to 30 pounds overweight during high school, and that's, you know, horrible, awful, you know, it was horrible. And Sarah was one of these beautiful girls, you know, the one, she was a cheerleader of course, and she just had, you know, it seemed like the perfect slim figure. And she you know, she was kind of from an affluent family. So she, her clothes she wore, they were so beautiful. She would wear these beautiful like jeans with the rhinestones in them, or, you know, this was the seventies folks.
Rita Black: So you can just, or the flared legs, you know, and the cute little thing, you know, shirts and everything hung so well on her and it just did not hang on me. In fact, the only thing hanging on me was fat and my thighs hanging over the chair while hers, you know, fit into the chair easily. In French class, I would look at her, I would just go, God, I hate her. She's got it so easy. Like, she probably goes home and it's just so easy for her. And the one thing would be, I would watch her eat at the lunchroom because, you know, I was always on a diet and I would, you know, like they had a salad bar at my high school, if you could call it a salad bar, you know, it was like iceberg, lettuce is chopped up with a side bowl of cheddar cheese and ranch dressing and a few cherry tomatoes and maybe some chopped up shallots, or not shallots, but scallions green onions.
Rita Black: So anyway, I would get my little salad, sad salad, and sit there. And then I would watch her chow down like four or three or four pieces of pizza, like, and she's talking to all the boys, eating the pizza. God, I hated her so much, you know? And she was smart, you know, she had it all. Okay? So she could, she was sitting with the football players eating like a football player. And here she was like as skinny as a rail and she looked awesome. And so here was my inner speak. She's so lucky and I'm a fricking jerk. Now, if you've worked with me or have gone through the Shift Weight Mastery Process, the one thing that we really work very hard on is struggling. You know, shedding, shedding, shedding our weight struggler identity, and stepping into a new identity as a student of weight mastery.
Rita Black: Because that immediately opens up our brain and makes us creative and think differently. It puts us outside of the box that we live in because I really believe in their, like our, we have a mental box of struggle that is comprised of our beliefs and our habits and our identity. So when we begun, we step out of that old box and step into this identity of a student weight mastery, it opens up our mind and we start to see the world from a different place. And we start to see ourselves from a different place. We start to see food and exercise from a different place, and we aren't struggling with it anymore. We're learning to interact with it powerfully and ourselves powerfully as well.
Rita Black: So I wanna look at the skinny people from a thin thinking perspective and and start to poke holes in these beliefs so that we have some power and we can step outside of that box that we're in. So here's the belief. Skinny people can eat whatever food they want and stay slim. So let's unpack this. Okay? So here is a fact. Some people, some skinny people can eat a lot of crap foods and not gain weight. Yes, there are those who have either a high metabolism or there's satiety and hunger hormones work in their favor, meaning their hormones are rigged in such a way that they feel full right away or they don't get as hungry. So there are those out there, but those people are only about 10 to 15% of the population. That's not a lot of people out there. But a lot of these skinny people that may seem blessed with a super high metabolism or hormones that are rigged in their favor, they actually struggle with eating. And how do I know this? Because they come to me and they might say, you know, I want to eat a better diet.
Rita Black: Like I've been eating a bunch of crap for years and years and years cuz I can, but now I'm addicted to those foods and I feel trapped in this relationship with junk food, drive through food. And all they wanna do is eat vegetables. They just want to be able to eat a healthy diet because it, believe it or not, even the fact that they aren't gaining weight because they're eating all this crap, it makes them feel bad. It makes them feel like crap. It makes them feel out of control and miserable. So even though this 10% of the population can eat what they want, many are not necessarily partying down or happy about it. They have their own cross to bear with food. Now, in addition, eating junk, just doesn't lead to weight gain, right? It can create cancer, heart disease, pre-diabetes, Alzheimer's, dementia, and hurts everybody. Heavy orhan, right?
Rita Black: So some people also who are skinny struggle to keep the weight on. I mean, seriously struggle to keep the weight on. And again, it might seem, oh, well they're lucky they can drink three milkshakes and not gain an ounce. But these people, a lot of them are very ashamed of their bodies because they are so thin. They have almost the opposite thing with us at the beach. They're, you know, they cover themselves up because they're so thin. So it does swing both ways. They're, you know, thin people, but they're, they've got their own cross to bear. Now, of course, you may say, but Rita, certainly there is more than 10 to 15% of the population that is thin. So let's discuss those other skinny people. There is a pretty big segment of the population that is also thin, but they don't fall into that 10 to 15% super high metabolism or hormones rigged in the right way.
Rita Black: There is just some thin people who have always been thin, but they work at staying slim. Now, how do I know this so well? Well whether or not you know me or you don't, I have been, you know, seeing people as a hypnotherapist for over 20 years. And I'm also somebody who's struggled with my own weight up and down the scale, 40 pounds. So I'm highly interested and intrigued by everybody's journey with food and exercise and how they take care of themselves. So I work with people who do not struggle with weight. I work with smokers, but I also work with a large amount of people who are, you know, looking for other help. But I ask everybody, I say, so what do you do? Do you do anything? Like, you know, you seem like a pretty healthy looking person. Are you doing anything to manage your weight?
Rita Black: Or I might, you know, say to somebody or you know, you tell me more about how you're feeding yourself because you know that, I'm just kind of curious. I like to know how people take care of themselves. So, and I will tell you that probably 85% of these people have an answer for me. It's not like they're saying, oh, you know what, I just wake up and I eat a croissant and then, you know, I go and get a hamburger for lunch. And, you know, they have got a program that they're working, and I don't mean a program outside themselves, but they've figured out some rules for themselves in their relationship to school. And these people, I mean, in relationship to food, and these people have never struggled with their weight, but they have, they recognized that in order to stay slim, you know, they were blessed to be thin growing up, but they recognized as they became adults and their metabolism began to slow down.
Rita Black: They needed to moderate the way that they were eating in order to stay healthy and slim. Or maybe not so healthy but slim. So I would get answers all the time, like, I don't eat sugar, or I eat one meal a day, or I exercise every single day, or I don't eat gluten, or I don't eat in between meals. You know, there was there. Or they'll, they would sit down and just go, let me tell you what I've figured out. You know, they, people love to talk about the way they eat and take care of themselves, right? So they're thin and maybe they've never struggled, but they have a plan to stay thin and they work their plan. This world is full of food. Haven't you noticed? There are food signals on television, there are food signals in social media, there's food signals in magazines and on billboards.
Rita Black: And everywhere we look, we are bombarded with imagery of food. Now, even slim people have to manage that in some way, in some sort of internal mechanism system are, you know, a way of operating in the world or else they begin to gain weight. Now these often people are exercising or they're just, you know, like I said, they've made, I eat two meals a day. I don't eat in between. Whatever it is they are managing. This is what I want you to understand is they are managing their weight. You know? I think we think when we struggle with our weight that everybody's lucky and nobody has to think about this stuff. Nobody has to worry about the gym. They just go to the gym to look good and their clothes. Nobody has to, you know, think about what they're planning. They don't have to plan what they're eating for the week or think of, you know, or make healthy choices when they go to the restaurant. And that's absolutely not true. And when we think that it makes us a victim, it makes us a victim and it makes us think of that type of eating, taking care of ourselves, having to manage our weight as a negative thing rather than a powerful thing.
Rita Black: And I think we have an opinion about these people, you know, and I think we look at skinny people who are focused on health and focused on their weight and focused on eating in a particular way. I think we call them obsessive. I think we call them health nuts. You know? We have terms for that. And I'm not saying that some of these people might be going overboard and have, you know, certainly there are a number of thin people who have eating disorders, what have you, but a large percent of the population has just figured out a way of eating that works for them and they work their program and to have an opinion about them, like they're obsessive or their health nuts hurts you. It doesn't hurt them. You know? We wanna create a loving and nurturing relationship with food. And if we are creating a subconscious negative feeling about people who are healthy and focused and slim, then doesn't that negatively impact our internal feeling, our subconscious feeling about wanting to be healthy and slim ourselves? We're creating healthy and slim as a negative idea in our subconscious mind. I don't know, isn't that food for thought?
Rita Black: Our opinion about slim and healthy people? Our negative opinion, our resentment might be creating this negative idea of being slim for ourselves. Where we have aversion to that. I'm just starting to point out how our seemingly innocent or well-deserved beliefs about how annoying people are that are thin, they might be hurting us. And it's easy to make assumptions about thin people.
Rita Black: For instance, you might know a thin person who can chow down in front of you. Here they are eating a burger and fries and are wearing a pair of skinny jeans while you're eating a salad and feeling a little full and, you know, maybe you're wearing a relaxed fit jeans and it may seem unfair, like why can they chow down on all this food and I have to eat a salad and I'm still struggling with my weight, but maybe you don't know the whole story. Maybe they aren't, they didn't eat anything earlier that day. Or maybe they're not gonna eat again until tomorrow afternoon. You know? We don't always know the full story when we see a thin person chowing down on food, for example, remember that cheerleader Sarah that I was talking about? You know, she could chow down three or four slices a piece for lunch and probably that equaled about 1200 calories for lunch, right?
Rita Black: So that's a fair amount of calories. But maybe she didn't eat breakfast. And definitely she was gonna go for a three hour cheerleading practice after school that would burn a good portion of those calories. Me, I ate my measly salad for lunch, but I went home and I made a batch of cookie dough to drown my sorrows about how lucky Sarah was and how lucky I was. And then I would fall into a sugar coma nap and not move at all for the rest of the afternoon. And by the time 5:00 PM rolled around, Sarah had burned off two thirds of the pizza calories and was netting about 400 calories. Me with the cookie dough and the zero exercise netting about 3000 calories. See? All my resentment of Sarah being so lucky that resentment hurt me. It didn't hurt her. She was off to cheerleading practice.
Rita Black: She didn't even think for a second about me, but I was hurting myself with that resentment. And often, you know, our resentment is a very fattening emotion and we eat over it. So can you see how our skinny people are lucky cuz they can eat anything they want. Assumption can be damaging to us. You know? The media puts a lot of false images that perpetuate this as well. It's not all our fault. Look, it's not your fault. We're thrown to this and we are surrounded in a world that gives us false images and, you know, really does favor thin people in the media images that we see. So we see people with food items in their hand chowing down who look skinny and slim. But that's probably not the whole truth, you know?
Rita Black: For instance, I read in a, you know, trashy magazine, yes. Trashy magazine. I read in a People or an okay magazine that and I'm not gonna mention their name, but you'll probably know who I'm talking about. But this was in a magazine, so I'm not like divulging anything that's secret or new. But I read in this magazine that a very popular food network chef, who is a slim, lovely Italian woman you know, she looks skinny. She is skinny, she's lovely and firm and you know, has a big smile on her face and she eats all these amazing pastas and tiramisu. And you just see her chowing down on all this food that she's made looking happy, licking her lips. And you just think, gosh, that's so unfair. She's so beautiful and she can eat all that Italian food and never gain an ounce. Well, come to find out there's a spit bucket right on the side.
Rita Black: And as soon as the take is done, she spits that food out into the spit bucket. She is working her program. She is not consuming all of those calories. And she probably, you know, let's face it, gets sick of that. You know? How many bites of pasta can you eat? Well, maybe a lot, but you know, she probably gets a little sick of that food anyway. But the point I'm making is there's an illusion out there that slim people have it easy. They all get to eat all the tiramisu they want. And you know, we're, we look at tiramisu and we gain five pounds, and that's not always the whole story.
Rita Black: So there's a lot of crazy ideas floating around these days. So let's take our power back, shall we, from the weight struggler beliefs and emotions, and come at this instead, as people who respect themselves, who are mastering their weight and creating a powerful change where we take 100% responsibility for our bodies and what they do and ourselves and our relationship with food, and create a more powerful relationship with skinny people. Let's set them free to set ourselves free, shall we?
Rita Black: So here are some facts. Yes, some people can eat what they want and it doesn't make them healthy or happy. And some skinny people work at staying skinny, and some people work at being skinny or don't work at being skinny and can eat whatever they want. But after the age of 40, they begin gaining weight. And because their metabolism has finally slowed down. And I get a lot of those people who come to see me and they're all of a sudden, what am, what's happening? I'm gaining weight, I'm eating the same amount of food, and their metabolism has slowed down. So I have to laugh because I've gone to some high school reunions and all those skinny girls and bis who I envied and I was jealous of at my, what was it, my last reunion.
Rita Black: I went, because this, I'm coming to up to another reunion year this coming year. I'm class of 82. So it was, you know, 10, almost 10 years ago. So was that my 30th? It must have been my 30th. Well, 30th, yeah. It must have been 30th. I think it's my 40th coming up. Wow. Anyway they were heavier set, you know, and, and I, it was interesting because it was, it was a real interesting thing for me to see that, you know, like it was kind of like ghosts were let out of my closet, like these demons. But what was interesting was my journey with food, my ownership of food, my, I had to work my relationship with food much earlier in my life. So when I got into my forties, I was okay. I knew how to manage my weight, and I didn't gain weight during menopause.
Rita Black: I stayed the same. But these women who were my peers in high school who were my skinny peers they were now having to figure that out. And some of them weren't so successful, and some of them I could tell felt really bad about themselves. So it's interesting, isn't it, and ironic that these things get turned around, but we give it so much power. So here's my three recommendations to start to change a relationship with skinny people. Number one, stop giving your power away by resenting skinny people. It makes us a victim. It makes us a have not person. You know? It doesn't work for us. And you are not a have not, that's not true. You are a powerful person and there is a lot you have that would make those skinny people jealous of you if you would just wake up to that and who, and, you know and use gratitude as a way to keep yourself grounded in your life, right?
Rita Black: Look at what you've got and look at all of who you are and all the amazing things that you do, and really give yourself credit. And it also takes away your power for you to fall into that negative belief that eating whatever you want makes you happy. It doesn't. Eating refined food, junk food, fast food, no matter what you weigh, takes your power and your health away. And that's just the truth. So focus on eating a healthy way of eating that allows you to retreats, that keeps you feeling good and vibrant, you know, and that has some junk food and fast food thrown in here and there. You can do that. But you know, that's focused on you feeling good in your skin, you feeling good in your body, that allows you to release weight and love yourself down the scale. Don't deprive or punish yourself or envy yourself down the scale. You're too good for that.
Rita Black: Now, number two, forgive. Forgive those skinny people. I'm gonna say it. Forgive them. Forgive them. Let the resentment go. Just let's all take a deep collective breath. Let the love in your heart for the skinniest person, you know, the person who looks the most amazing in their clothes, and give them some love. You know, there is a saying I love, I've probably mentioned it before, resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die, right? Skinny people aren't really suffering because you resent them, but you are. Take back your power from the skinny people and forgive 'em. They're just off living their skinny lives while you or me or all of us, you know will, will have, definitely me with that girl Sarah, you know, ate all my resentment and it looks like a batch of raw cookie dough. Let's just say it. I forgive you skinny people. I forgive you skinny people. I forgive you. I love, I feel the love in my heart for you.
Rita Black: You will be, you know, and, and love yourself and accept yourself as you get slimmer and slimmer because you've accepted this idea of being slimmer as a positive thing. So you've neutralized it in your mind because you've let that forgiveness in your heart. Embrace those slim people.
Rita Black: All right, three, get curious. What can skinny people teach you? All right, this is a good one. Believe me. They have taught me a lot. Once I loved and embraced thin people and let go of the resentment, I saw that there were things that they were doing. They were good and I could use them. So for instance, I had a friend who was skinny, never has struggled with her weight, and my jaw dropped when we went to a restaurant, a Mexican restaurant. And she told the waiter, she said, I only want half of a basket of chips.
Rita Black: Don't give me a full basket of chips. So take this full basket away and bring me half a basket, please. She was nice to him, but you know, she was clear and I was like, why did you do that? And she's like, look, you know, let's be real. We would both eat this entire basket of chips. And the problem is that then when my food came, I wouldn't enjoy my food cuz I'd already feel gross and full and I like to eat. I like the taste of my food, and if I eat those chips, it's gonna dull the taste of my food. And that was a real revelation to me because I was, I realized that, you know, she could probably eat the basket of chips and her food, but she wanted to enjoy, she wanted to be mindful, she wanted to savor and relish the wonderful taste of the food and not be too full and stuffed.
Rita Black: You know, who wants to feel bloated and gross when their food comes? Not really many, any people, but she created a system for herself and she created willpower for herself by just removing half a bag, half of a basket of chips. So that was very interesting. Now, I had another friend, and this is another interesting, you know, like, again, you watch these thin people, you can learn from them. So I had this friend, it was very quirky, but they only ate the insides out of like a cheese danish or an apple danish. Like they would only eat the fruit out of the Danish or you know, like they, we would go out to eat and I would watch them just kind of like eat like the cheese and then you know, maybe a quarter of their enchilada and they ate it very slowly. And then maybe they would kind of, you know or not even an enchilada, just like something that you could see that they were like going for certain things and, you know, they would only eat a few bi sub other things.
Rita Black: And I was like, well, what's up? And they, this other friend told me that I only eat a plus foods. I only eat a plus foods. Like if it's not an amazing food, like then I'm not gonna put it in my body. You know, like I really enjoy and savor really good food, but I've really, you know, I don't have time for the foods that are subpar. You know? I have a nice taste poll and I wanna enjoy the foods that I eat. So, you know, you'd see them eat a couple of bites of something and decide, oh, oh, okay, yeah, that's not so great. I'm not gonna focus on that. And as we all know, or maybe you don't, but you know, after three bites of food, your mouth experience goes down, you know, substantially maybe 70%. So for a lot of us, a plus foods are really those first few bites and then afterwards it all becomes C minus food.
Rita Black: So think about that. That's was something I learned from a thin friend. And I had this other slim friend, her name was Francine, and this was back in my twenties. I knew her. We worked together and she loved to get hungry. Like she wouldn't eat unless she was hungry. Not starved, but hungry. Like she would, you know, even if something amazing crossed her in front of her, she was like, I'm not really hungry and I like to eat when I'm hungry because then the food tastes really good. I don't think food tastes good if I'm not really hungry, so I'm not gonna waste my time. Isn't that interesting? So there are things to be learned, you know, cuz it really reframed my view of thin peoples being, you know, these people who can eat all the time and eat all they want.
Rita Black: They actually just have cultivated these quirky and interesting rules and ways that they interact with food that allows them to feel like I have the relationship with food that I like and I love. So those are some thin thinking mental shifts, you know, there's ways to, you know, forgive slim people. And now I wanna just finish up with a few tips, right? About skinny people. So first all, I guess this is thin thinking, okay? I'm gonna call it thin thinking. So notice your thoughts about skinny people. Just notice your thoughts about them. Is this thought giving me power or is this thought taking my power away? Is it making me a victim of the thin person or the idea of being thin? Is it giving them more power? Or is it giving, staying in that place that I am at more power?
Rita Black: Is it making, being struggling with my weight more powerful than the idea of me becoming slim? Or is it making the idea of being slim unpleasant because I believe slim people are annoying. So just shift those thoughts. And here's one, here's a little mantra. I am moving in the direction of being healthy and slim. I am moving in the direction of being healthy and slim. Here's another mantra. I am curious about the slim people in my life. I am curious about the slim people in my life. Is there something I can learn from them? Here's another one. I am open to appreciating slim people. I am open to appreciating slim people. I am open to appreciating myself and what I have in my life. Here's my last one, my favorite. I am loving myself down the scale. I am loving myself down the scale. Okay?
Rita Black: Wow. Well, you all, I hope that helped you open your heart, not only to skinny people, but mostly to yourself. And I wanna thank you for being here and being part of the Thin Thinking family. We've had some great episodes and guests coming up this summer. I'm really excited. But just for today, join my free on.
Rita Black: Well, I hope that helped you open your heart, not only to skinny people, but to yourself. And I wanna thank you for being here and being part of the Thin Thanking family. I'm really excited. We do have some exciting episodes and guests coming up this summer. And don't forget, you can join my free online on demand masterclass called How to Stop the Start Over Weight Trickle Cycle and Begin Releasing Weight for Good. The link is in the show notes. Have an amazing week. And remember that the key and probably the only key to unlocking the door, the weight struggle is inside you. So keep listening and find it and I will see you next week.
Rita Black: You wanna dive deeper into the mindset of long-term weight release, head on over to www.shiftweightmastery.com. That's www.shiftweightmastery.com, where you'll find numerous tools and resources to help you unlock your mind for permanent weight release tips, strategies, and more. And be sure to check the show notes to learn more about my book From Fat to Thin Thinking, Unlock Your Mind for Permanent Weight Loss.
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